Vital Stats: 6'2", Early 40s, NYC Public School Teacher. Demeanor: Calm, assured and mature without making me feel like I was out with one of my parents' friends. Aesthetic: T-Shirt and Jeans (one can definitely work with that).
First Date: Met via OKCupid dating site. First date at Japanese restaurant on Stuyvesant Street near Astor Place, NYC. June 2010.
First Impression: Normal. Too normal.
Signs of Hope: The conversation flowed. He told me about his job, dealing with troubled kids, traveling in Japan, and we discussed our common Scottish-mix heritage. He was attractive, fit and I was relatively attracted. I found myself wondering: if he had acted more hot and cold, would I have found him more attractive?
I also found myself hoping that he liked me. Although there were no overt signs he did, the underlying body language was there. Also, he was originally Canadian. I love Canadians.
Red Flags: It's not so much a red flag as an observation. When the waiter brought hot towels prior to ordering, not only did #110 run the towel over his hands but he also rubbed it over his face. In earnest. At first, I was mildly alarmed. Now, however, I'm thinking (hoping) that maybe since he lived in Japan for three years, he knows something I don't.
Turning Point: We ordered snacks and sat for two hours. We almost silently agreed to a stopping point, at which time I said I was tired. He picked up the tab (phew) without flinching (bonus) and then we walked down to the sidewalk. I told him I had fun and we agreed we should do it again. He said he'd call me. As I walked away, I realized he didn't have my phone number.
Diagnosis: He may call; he may not call. As history has shown, generally, if I am even remotely interested in someone, he proves to be emotionally unavailable. Here's hoping that changes.
Update: The next day, he sent me an email saying that, since I was a journalist, he had a question for me about a story idea he had and asked if I had a phone number (note that he did not directly ask for my phone number). He said nothing about wanting to go out again or saying he had a good time. Baffled but thinking he was just shy, I gave him my number. He called and left a message with his question. When I called him back, we talked about his story idea and then, finally, at the end, he asked if I'd like to get together again. I think the whole question-email-phone thing was a big feeler set-up; he just wanted to see if I was still game before asking me out directly.
Update 2: Except I never heard from him again.
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