Mr. Unavailable #118: The Delay

See The Five-Year Time Warp and He's Got Wheels for the background on this one.

Update: #118 is looking less and less available, but we're giving him the benefit of the doubt.

Here's the update:

A few days after date #1 with #118, I was sort of surprised I hadn't heard from him. And when I say sort of surprised, I mean shocked. He sent me a nice message the day after the date saying he'd had a nice time, and I'd responded likewise, but then nada. Five days after the date, I walked into my shrink's office, collapsed on her couch and admitted I was baffled. "On our date, it seemed like he wanted to go out again sooner rather than later," I said, noting how he'd suggested SundayMondayTuesday.

She suggested I call or send him a message referencing something from the date. She emphasized not to ask him out, just act interested. I was too chicken to call, so I sent him an email asking how poker night with the guys had gone. A few hours later, he got back to me saying he'd been very busy but still definitely wanted to get together. He said he'd drop me a line on Wednesday. On Wednesday, I heard nothing. Then, on Thursday, as I was walking home from the dentist, he called. I'd just had a cavity filled, so half of my face was numb from novocaine, but I answered anyway.

"If I sound funny," I warned him, "it's because half of my face is paralyzed." It was probably also a good cover in the event I sounded annoyed, which I was just a tiny, tiny, tiny bit. And by tiny, tiny, tiny bit, I mean a lot.

He laughed and said he was sorry he hadn't gotten in touch with me the day before. He meant to call but was busy with a deadline for a project. He said he had plans for Thursday, Friday and Saturday, and asked what my schedule looked like. He didn't leave a whole lot of options, so I said, "How about Sunday then?" Sunday was good for him, too--for Black Swan, or maybe dinner, or maybe a play that a friend of his could get him comp tickets for: "You're name is all over that," he said.

Sunday rolled around. He called around 1:30 and said, "Yeah, I'm going to have to cancel for tonight...I'm really sorry..."

I'm not going to lie, I was disappointed. Bummed. Annoyed. Irked. And a few other things. It turned out he'd gotten more projects with more deadlines.

"No worries," I said. "It's good to have work."

He asked me what my schedule looked like. I said I had plans on Monday. He had plans on Tuesday. So we settled on Wednesday.

Signs of Hope: At least we have another day nailed down. He brought up seeing Black Swan again saying, "Yeah, we'd better watch out. I heard it's pretty sexy...," which was cute. He offered to leave the theater for periods of time if it got too awkward. I said we could take turns.

Red Flags: If he doesn't have time to date, then he probably doesn't have time for a relationship.

Diagnosis: For him: Is it all bullshit? Two weeks between dates?
For me: If it's always going to be two weeks between dates, that probably won't work for me. For now, I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt. He did call to reschedule, and said he was sorry, which is a stand-up move. Although, with my track record on second dates, who knows if I'll even like him on date #2.